It’s comfortingly different from now.
You can see the building blocks,
Of where you’ve ended up.
But there’s always a reason why it’s past.
Why things have changed.
So I don’t sit long.
I had the cards. The stamps. And I sat down a number of times to write them but always ended up wandering off again.
Then it hit me today as I was running. I’ve lost three of the first, close friends I made when I moved here. To write cards highlight’s holes in my life.
This year has had me wrestling with the doubt that I’m a good friend. I think I’m a good person but friend? When I can be cut off so easily? It’s made me feel awkward round people.
Amongst all the angst and drama I’ve been spending time soul searching. I’ve worked on being a person I can look in the mirror at.
I’ve changed, come so far from the person I was a year ago. So maybe it’s right that who I am no longer fits in with their lives.
Our journeys have changed.
Those who give me their time,
I keep close.